Life really does go on!

I guess the world isn't going to stand still just for me. It's funny.  Usually people find inspiration in these brilliant quotes.  My new quote to live by, 'Today I am happier than a bird with a french fry!'  We make choices, and those choices determine if you are happy or sad.  Every day gets better and better.  I don't quite have total control over the anxiety thing, but I am working on it.  Last weekend I didn't comb my hair, I didn't shower, I didn't even get out of bed.  Not anymore.  I finally found a counselor that I like, I actually look forward to talking to him.  I have discovered the robbery was just the icing on the cake.  My 'emotional bucket' was full, the robbery just knocked it over.  I will NOT live in this state anymore.  I want to find joy in the simple things, like a french fry!

Three weeks later, here I am.  I do feel better.  I am taking all actions that my Dr. recommends (even though I don't totally agree but that's a whole story in itself), I am staying active and exercising again, I faithfully keep a journal of my thoughts and feelings (which I have never done) and I am trying harder to live in the present, just worrying about this day, this minute.  Photography is picking up and I am always so flattered at how many repeat clients I get as well as new ones.  I am actually grateful that I have been forced to be grateful for what I have and not waste any more time feeling sorry for what I don't. I know how quickly life flies by and with or without me, it's going!  I want the time that I spend with my kids to really matter to them.  I want to cherish what time I have left with them.  I have two really great kids and that is what keeps me going everyday! 

I don't know what God has intended for me in this life, but I'm listening, I am standing at attention and ready to make better choices for the rest of my life on earth.  I don't know where Marty and I will be next week let alone in ten years, I am just trying to be patient and see where life takes us.  I think with age and circumstances, I have learned that healing takes time, so I am just taking it slow.

I am so grateful for my family and all of my awesome friends.  I couldn't do it without each and every one of you.  I am in awe of how many special people are in my life.   I am climbing out of my dark hole, and I am doing it for me, and for Baylie and Cam.  Again, thanks for all the love and support, you will never know how much it has helped me.  I guess right now I should go shower and wash my nappy hair :)!!